Harry Potter and NANCY DREW Crossover
by The Nori of the Universe
Summary: What can I say? I have an insane mind and I know how to use it...


Disclaimer: HP belongs to J.K., ND belongs to Carolyn Keene (did I get that right?) and this belongs now to FF.net. 

Author's note: You know, next I might be writing a Sweet Valley High fic.. *ducks ten gallons' worth of marshmallows flung her way* okay, okay, I wont... besides I hate those books, if you can even call them books. About this, lets just say this is yet another of my dad's whacky ideas, which it is... 

*Okay. Here's the case: Nancy Drew and her friends are going to England to investigate "The Mystery of the Weird Happenings around England"* 

Nancy Drew: Where's Bess? I told her to meet me here at five o'clock sharp! 

Bess (breathlessly, running up to her): Oh, Nancy, I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to come this late, I was just packing for our trip... 

George F. (amused): Without you here, Nnacy, she would have gone with her entire closet. 

Nancy: Come on, girls, we're going to England! 

*they all board a plane to England. Meanwhile, with Harry and co...* 

Harry (on his broom): Oof... got it! *catches the Snitch* 

Gryffindors, Hufflepuffs and Ravenclaws: YYEEEEEEEAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!! 

Slytherins (muttering darkly): Urglmooorglarf 

Me (invisible right now): Hee hee. They don't know what they have in store for them, do they... 

*after the game* 

Ron (beaming): Harry! Great job! 

Hermione (also beaming): Oh, Harry! You were wonderful! *Ron scowls slightly* 

Harry (beaming as well): You should have seen Malfoy's face up there- 

Snape (hurrying past them): Potter- stuck up little... 

Harry, Hermione and Ron (glaring suddenly): Grrr... 

*Nancy and Co. at hotel* 

Nancy: Girls! I've got an idea. Why don't we look for clues and then meet up back here for lunch? 

Bess: Good, yes, at eleven, right? 

George F.: How about one? 

Nancy: Oh, come on, chums, let's meet up at twelve, why not? 

All: Okay 

*Go off in various directions; Bess: stores, Nancy: downtown, George F.: running trails* 

Me (getting more excited): MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Geez, now I sound like a monkey...okay, let's speed time up now. 

*It's exactly twelve now...* 

Bess: _munch, munch_. (eating a ham and cheese sandwich, a chocolate milkshake and a banana split) 

George (frowning): How can you eat all that now? 

Nancy (excited): George, Bess listen, I think I've got a clue! 

Bess and George: Tell us Nancy! 

Nancy: I saw an old man who works at Kings Cross- you know, the train station- and he said he'd seen many very weird people go into the train but never go out at all. That must be some kind of clue- I propose we go and investigate right now. 

Bess (still munching): Nancy! That's so exciting! Do you think there's a trapdoor where they go? 

George: I'll go ask if we can borrow a car to get there. 

*an hour goes by while they eat their lunches, go find a taxi, and arrive at King's Cross* 

Nancy: Careful, girls, there's a lot of people here today. 

George: Yes, there are. Where do you suppose they're all going? 

Bess: I don't know, I have no idea. 

*they wander asround the crowded station, till they arrive between Platforms 9 and 10* 

Nancy (leans back against wall): Ooh, I'm tired. Maybe someone's trying to sabotage this... *falls into Platform 9 3/4's, which for some reason at this point is only letting in different, main character fictional characters from books and not normal, fictional Muggle characters from Harry Potter...* 

George (scared): Nancy? Where are you? Bess, she disappeared! 

Bess: I think she went this way! (backs up to the wall, falls through too, pulling George in with her.) 

All: Oof! 

Nancy (standing up and gazing around): Oh! I'll bet this is the way to the solution! Follow me, girls! 

*To speed things up, I magically congure up some horses for them to ride to the castle* 

Harry (partying out with his friends celebrating their win against Slytherin): Oh, yeah! 

Ron (dancing with Hermione): Yeah! 

Hermione (with Ron): Oh- yes! 

Fred and George Weasley: Exploding Firworks! Yeah! 

*Okay, they're having fun. Lotsa fun. Nancy and Co. arrive at the castle* 

Nancy: Maybe this is where it all is- oh my gosh, girls, did you see that as well? 

George and Bess (nodding, frightned. Horses suddenly disappear, and they don't notice anything): Yes! Fireworks just- just fell out of that tower there! There must be someone in there! 

Nancy: Okay, girls. Let's go in. 

All (arrive at front doors): Oh my gosh... it's big... (fortunately, nobody's there, they're all at Hogsmeade or in their offices) 

Nancy (concentrating): Didn't the tower go in this direction? 

All: (nod) 

*They creep slowly around the castle, which is deserted, and nobody notices the protraits on the walls, strangely enough... and meanwhile, party is toning down for a while.* 

Harry: Oh, no, I've just remembered- Ron? 

Ron (Hermione in his arms still, dancing to a slow beat): Yeah, Harry? 

Harry (disgustedly): I've got detention with Snape. See you later. 

Ron (mumbling): Er- yeah... 

Harry (shaking his head, suddenly in a bad mood): Ron and Hermione... *goes over to portrait and swings it open. Find Nancy and Co. out there* 

Harry (shocked then relieved it's not the BSC but still scared): Aaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

Nancy and George and Bess: Aaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!! 

Harry: Who are you??????????? 

Nancy, George and Bess: Who are_ you_?????????????? 

Harry (runs screaming back into common room, everybody in there starts screaming too for no apparent reason at all.): Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!! 

Nancy, George and Bess (in the confusion of noise, they run screaming into the common room and the Fat Lady swings back to cover the hole. Fat Lady chuckles mercilessly): Aaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

Me (I materialize out of thin air in the confusion): Ah, yes, PANDEMONIUM!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Muahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!! 

Harry (recognizes me): AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Run for your lives!!!!!!!!!!!! It's the evil fanfic writer who made me meet the BabySitters Club!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

Me (slightly offended): Hey, it wasn't that bad, was it? 

Harry (resumes running): YES I MEAN NO! AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

Nancy, George and Bess: Where are we? 

(meanwhile, everyone is running around, half the common room is empty of food and the other half is covered in food and empty of people- not for long.) 

Professor McGonagall (rushes into room): What is the meaning of all this? 

Me (laughing hysterically): ::gasps::: This is soooooooo funny, you wouldn't belive it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

Hermione (runs up to me): Nori, you can't Apparate inside the Hogwarts grounds! I read about it in Hogwarts, a History! 

Me: Oh, yeah, oops, let's just say- okay, Hogwarts a History didn't mention ME not being able to Apparate!!!!!!! Muahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!!! 

Hermione (confused ofr a second): Oh- wait a second- I'm sure- Aaaaahhhhhhh! Help! 

*picture the room as a mosh pit, everyone starts running counterclockwise around the room, running into each other and banging against each other, crumpling the sodas and chip bags and stuff* 

McGonagall (swept up in the current): No! I demand a stop to this! One moment! Aaaaaahhhhhh!!!! 

Nancy (eyes gleaming): This is really quite good, we might be able to solve the case! *gets trampled under ten thousand feet* Aaaaarrrggg! 

Me (giggles): Heehee. (grins mischieviously and holds up.... you got it, PIXIE POWER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) 

Everyone (tries to stop but can't): Oh NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!! The evil fanfic writer has her weapon, PIXIE STIX!!!!!!!! 

Me: Nooooooooooooooooooooo!!!! It's PIXIE _POWER_!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Not PIXIE _STIX_!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!__

Voldemort (suddenly Apparates inside the common room): Oh, no.... not this again...(tries to hide but I see him as well as everyone else) 

Everyone else: Aaaaaaaahhhhhhhh! Oh, good it's just Voldemort. 

Bess and George (very confused and frightened): Nancy? Where are you- and who's Voldemort? 

Hermione (looking frustrated): But- but, You-Know-Who, you can't _Apparate_ inside HOGWARTS GROUNDS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

Me: EVERYONE WITHIN HEARING RANGE, GRAB A _PIXIE POWER_ STICK AND EAT SOME HAPPY _PIXIE POWER_!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

Everyone within hearing range (ten thousand of them, every one inside the castle): OKIES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

*everything stops, totally, for one second* 

Someone: Hey, didn't someone else invent **_okies_**? 

Someone else: Oh, who cares. 

Someone: OKIES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

*everything resumes its pandemonium* 

Me (elated): YESYESYESYES!!!!!! Now have some water!!!!! Wait a sec, I need to expand the room for a second, we're all tight in here,a ren't we? 

Everyone (who is now hyper or getting there, about 5/6 people there): YESYESYESYES!!!!! 

Harry (face ashen, glancing from me to Voldemort): Oh, noooooooo. 

Voldemort (grabs pixie POWER and holds it like a wand): Ahah! 

*room is expanded so everyone can breath a little better, courtsey of me* 

Me: Yes! PANDEMONIUM! And, by the way, Voldie, that's precious PIXIE POWER you're holding there, so eat it or give it to someone who really needs it, like me. 

Harry (runs out of room up stairs to dormitory to escape from me): Aaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhh! 

Voldemort (considers for a second, then eats the PIXIE POWER): Muahahahahahaha!!!!!! Ahah! 

Me (suddenly disgusted): Hmmm... I've got to do somehting about those Muahahahaha's, he sounds like a monkey! (grabs another PIXIE POWER OF STIX) Oh well. 

Me again (revelling in the pandemonium, mind furiously working already to figure out some way to create even more pandemonium): This HAS been fun, hasn't it? 

Snape (bursts inside the common room, immediately trampled like Nancy had been): POTTER WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE, WHAT ABOUT OUR DETEN- Wha- oh, Noooooooooooooooo it's that author!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Fanfic- author, must- get- out!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

Me (takes off face and becomes Dumbledore for a second): I daresay, look what happens when we've got a bit of POWER! 

McGonagall, Snape and Hermione (faint): Oh, no. 

Everyone else: YESYESYESYESYES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

Me (take off face again and become myself again): YESYESYESYES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

Ron: Hermione? 

Me: It's okay, Ron, look, I'll make sure nobody tramples her... 

Ron (falls down head over heels over Hermy): Okies... 

Real Dumbledore (does little dance where you make peace signs w/ your fingers and look like you're wiping sweat off your brow with them...): Do a little dance, make a little FLUB... 

Me (grins maniaclley): And we all live happily ever after... 

Another Authors' Note: **_Okies_**!!!!! Whoever made that word up, I'm stuck with it now!!!!!!!! By The Way, **_review_**, that's what the little box down there is for. Like it? Good. Review. Hate it? Bad. Review anyways. PIXIE POWERED? Review and tell me. Insane like me? GOOD!!!!!!!!! REVIEW!!!!!!!!!!! 


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